Sitting together on a train travelling through the Swiss Alps , were a Kiwi guy, an Australian bloke, a little old Greek lady, and a young blonde Swiss girl with large breasts.
The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound of a loud slap.
When the train emerges from the tunnel, the Kiwi has a bright red hand print on his cheek.
No one speaks.
The old lady thinks: The Kiwi guy must have groped the blonde in the dark, and she slapped his cheek.
The blonde Swiss girl thinks:That Kiwi guy must have tried to grope me in the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she slapped his cheek.
The Kiwi thinks:The Australian bloke must have groped the blonde in the dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead.
The Australian thinks:I can't wait for another tunnel, just so I can smack that Kiwi again.
Monday, December 17, 2007
before and after marriage
Before marriage....
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: No! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: No! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Every chance I get.
She: Will you hit me?
He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
She: Darling!
After marriage....
Simply read from bottom to top.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Monday, November 26, 2007
Zero Tolerance on Speeding
With the road toll continuing to increase each year especially around the Christmas Holiday period, this will be the first year that Zero Tolerance Speed Cameras will be introduced in Queensland in December gearing up to the holiday period.
The new cameras look different to the normal cameras. A photo is included so that you are familiar with them and able to make sure not to speed when approaching.
Please take this warning seriously.
Speed kills.
The new cameras look different to the normal cameras. A photo is included so that you are familiar with them and able to make sure not to speed when approaching.
Please take this warning seriously.
Speed kills.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
thought for the day
Handle every situation like a dog .
If you can't Eat it, Chew it, or Hump it.
Piss on it and Walk Away.
If you can't Eat it, Chew it, or Hump it.
Piss on it and Walk Away.
Monday, November 12, 2007
having sons
For those of you who were fortunate to have daughters ONLY, be glad.... be very, very glad....You find out interesting things when you have sons, like...
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'uh oh', it's already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy.
11.) 'Play Dough' and 'microwave' should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super Glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'uh oh', it's already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy.
11.) 'Play Dough' and 'microwave' should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super Glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
Friday, November 9, 2007
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
level 6 water restrictions
In Australia we are currently experiencing the worst drought in more than 100 years.
We are currently at level 5 water restrictions which means no outdoor watering (washing cars, watering garden etc) and 4 min showers etc.
Level 6 water restrictions are coming next month and this is what we'll have to resort to.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
a blonde's year in review
JANUARY
TOOK NEW SCARF BACK TO STORE BECAUSE IT WAS TOO TIGHT.
FEBRUARY
FIRED FROM PHARMACY JOB FOR FAILING TO PRINT LABELS.....HELLLLOOOO!!!.......BOTTLES WON'T FIT IN PRINTER !!!
MARCH
GOT REALLY EXCITED.....FINISHED JIGSAW PUZZLE IN 6 MONTHS.....BOX SAID "2-4 YEARS!"
APRIL
TRAPPED ON ESCALATOR FOR HOURS .... POWER WENT OUT!!!
MAY
TRIED TO MAKE KOOL-AID.....WRONG INSTRUCTIONS....8 CUPS OF WATER WON'T FIT INTO THOSE LITTLE PACKETS!!!
JUNE
TRIED TO GO WATER SKIING.......COULDN'T FIND A LAKE WITH A SLOPE.
JULY
LOST BREAST STROKE SWIMMING COMPETITION.....LEARNED LATER,THE OTHER SWIMMERS CHEATED, THEY USED THEIR ARMS!!!
AUGUST
GOT LOCKED OUT OF MY CAR IN RAIN STORM.....CAR SWAMPED BECAUSE SOFT-TOP WAS OPEN.
SEPTEMBER
THE CAPITAL OF CALIFORNIA IS "C".....ISN'T IT???
OCTOBER
HATE M & M'S.....THEY ARE SO HARD TO PEEL.
NOVEMBER
BAKED TURKEY FOR 4 1/2 DAYS .. INSTRUCTIONS SAID 1 HOUR PER POUND AND I WEIGH 108!!
DECEMBER
COULDN'T CALL 911 ..... "DUH".....THERE'S NO "ELEVEN" BUTTON ON THE STUPID PHONE!!!
TOOK NEW SCARF BACK TO STORE BECAUSE IT WAS TOO TIGHT.
FEBRUARY
FIRED FROM PHARMACY JOB FOR FAILING TO PRINT LABELS.....HELLLLOOOO!!!.......BOTTLES WON'T FIT IN PRINTER !!!
MARCH
GOT REALLY EXCITED.....FINISHED JIGSAW PUZZLE IN 6 MONTHS.....BOX SAID "2-4 YEARS!"
APRIL
TRAPPED ON ESCALATOR FOR HOURS .... POWER WENT OUT!!!
MAY
TRIED TO MAKE KOOL-AID.....WRONG INSTRUCTIONS....8 CUPS OF WATER WON'T FIT INTO THOSE LITTLE PACKETS!!!
JUNE
TRIED TO GO WATER SKIING.......COULDN'T FIND A LAKE WITH A SLOPE.
JULY
LOST BREAST STROKE SWIMMING COMPETITION.....LEARNED LATER,THE OTHER SWIMMERS CHEATED, THEY USED THEIR ARMS!!!
AUGUST
GOT LOCKED OUT OF MY CAR IN RAIN STORM.....CAR SWAMPED BECAUSE SOFT-TOP WAS OPEN.
SEPTEMBER
THE CAPITAL OF CALIFORNIA IS "C".....ISN'T IT???
OCTOBER
HATE M & M'S.....THEY ARE SO HARD TO PEEL.
NOVEMBER
BAKED TURKEY FOR 4 1/2 DAYS .. INSTRUCTIONS SAID 1 HOUR PER POUND AND I WEIGH 108!!
DECEMBER
COULDN'T CALL 911 ..... "DUH".....THERE'S NO "ELEVEN" BUTTON ON THE STUPID PHONE!!!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
for art lovers
A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre Museum.
After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van.
However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.
When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied ---
"Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh".
(See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else. I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.)
After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van.
However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.
When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied ---
"Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh".
(See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else. I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.)
Monday, October 15, 2007
cheeky chap
A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing crisps from a neighbourhood shop.
I love how he walks in casually, then, speeds up on his getaway.
The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos.
Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.
The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Aberdeen, Scotland, and helped himself to a bag of crisps. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of crisps.
Customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of crisps because they think it's so funny.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
a day at the beach
A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, "The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is."
The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does. She replies, "The bigger THEY are, the dumber the man is."
Again satisfied with her answer, the boy goes back to the ocean to play. Shortly thereafter, the boy returns again, and promptly tells his mother: "Daddy is talking to the silliest lady on the beach, and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets.
The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does. She replies, "The bigger THEY are, the dumber the man is."
Again satisfied with her answer, the boy goes back to the ocean to play. Shortly thereafter, the boy returns again, and promptly tells his mother: "Daddy is talking to the silliest lady on the beach, and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets.
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Friday, October 5, 2007
what am i doing wrong?
THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings
-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY
Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
-----
PostingID: 432279810
THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't
be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings
-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY
Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
-----
PostingID: 432279810
THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't
be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.
Monday, October 1, 2007
birds and the bees
A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know," the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me."
Confused, the father asked what was wrong.
The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech.
At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth Fairy' speech.
When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech.
If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for."
Friday, September 28, 2007
national mental health week
Today is one of the many National Mental Health Days throughout the year.
You can do your bit by remembering to send an e-mail to at least one unstable person. ... My job is done!
From one unstable person to another... I hope everyone is happy in your head - we're all doin' okay in mine!
You can do your bit by remembering to send an e-mail to at least one unstable person. ... My job is done!
Life is too short for drama & petty things!
So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!
From one unstable person to another... I hope everyone is happy in your head - we're all doin' okay in mine!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Friday, September 14, 2007
australian workplace agreements
yeah! .. happy friday!
Sick Days
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor,
you are able to come to work.
Personal Days
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
Bereavement Leave
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or coworkers.
Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In rare cases
where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We
will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Toilet Use
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.
At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open,
and a picture will be taken. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company
bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category". Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal
size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Chubby
people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim -Fast.
Death Clause
Any worker found dead at their desk will be promptly fired. All deaths will need to be applied for in
advance and will only be approved if you can show that your death will not affect productivity.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience.
Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustration's, irritations, aggravations,
insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed
elsewhere.
Sick Days
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor,
you are able to come to work.
Personal Days
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
Bereavement Leave
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or coworkers.
Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In rare cases
where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We
will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Toilet Use
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.
At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open,
and a picture will be taken. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company
bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category". Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal
size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Chubby
people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim -Fast.
Death Clause
Any worker found dead at their desk will be promptly fired. All deaths will need to be applied for in
advance and will only be approved if you can show that your death will not affect productivity.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience.
Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustration's, irritations, aggravations,
insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed
elsewhere.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
how to weigh yourself
I can't believe I was doing it wrong all these years.
We must get the word out.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Monday, September 3, 2007
truest definition of globalisation
Finally, a definition of globalisation I can understand and to which I can relate
Question : What is the truest definition of Globalisation?
Answer : Princess Diana's death.
Question : How come?
Answer :
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles; treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.
This is sent to you by a Canadian, using Bill Gates's technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Maltese wharfies, and trucked to you by Kiwi freeloaders.
That, my friends, is Globalisation!
Question : What is the truest definition of Globalisation?
Answer : Princess Diana's death.
Question : How come?
Answer :
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles; treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.
This is sent to you by a Canadian, using Bill Gates's technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Maltese wharfies, and trucked to you by Kiwi freeloaders.
That, my friends, is Globalisation!
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
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